In the Final Hours

The competition is almost over and the men left standing are competing fiercely, doing everything within their power to get an edge on the competition. The display of machismo has been overwhelming, while each tries to force some extra beard growth from the overflow of manliness he exudes. It all comes down to what one can accomplish in these final hours. Displays of manliness we have witnessed include, but are not limited to the following events:

• We heard rumor that Matt stood on a competitors desk and roared while beating his chest, to show just how superior he really is.


• An ultimate-fighter-style showdown was spotted between Mike V and Nick B in the kitchen at lunch time.


• Travis and Peter took over the hallway in a duel to the death over who is really the tallest.


• Brent and Jared have been displaying their machismo in a side competition to see who can pick up the most women in one lunch hour.


• Zack was spotted driving a herd of Yaks toward the NYSE.


• The sales area has been turned into a weight-lifting competition floor with Steve trying to bench-press his entire team at once.


• We caught Charles rummaging through Dan I's desk looking for the coveted flannel shirt, which is the source of his beard-growing power.


• Meanwhile, Kevin reportedly bought a giant axe at the Fulton Street hardware store and tried to chop down the Seaport Christmas tree, Paul Bunyan-style.


• Monty was seen beating up the Santa at the Seaport Mall because he was insulted by his fake beard.


• We hear that this afternoon, the rest of the competitors will be participating in a steak-eating contest, which will be followed by a beer-chugging competition. More details on that as they unfold.

It seems to be a free-for-all over here today. Lets hope we all make it to the competition tomorrow! More on the riot that is our office has become in the coming hours.